The Metallic Aqua Blue Lacquer

I’m fine. It’s fine. Everything’s fine and as it should be and it’s not your fault. It really isn’t. It’s not your fault that I don’t know how to end things like a proper adult. I’m actually quite sorry so sorry that I’m crazy and I hang onto whoever the person is that is least…

Girl Powered Organisms

Before the bell the machine roused. It looked around and deciphered its current surroundings. 38.6171° N, 121.3283° W It rolled over and checked it’s audio visual computerized communication device for the time. One minute before the alarm blares, per normal. It feels like it should eat something as it has been more than 8 hours…

43 years, 2 months and 18 days of pugilism

I catch myself staring at ceilings. I don’t know more than I think that I do. She should be so much further I tell myself, so much stronger by now. If you care you’re stupid too. I think everybody in every car around me is watching me drive and judging. I’m so far away from…

Needs Assessment

He asked me and then he begged. He insulted me and then he took it right back. He said I hurt him and then he said he couldn’t want me any more than right then. He promised to kiss my face off  and to put it on me. And I stopped fighting and he advised…

Turkey Necks

He only talks to me because I talk to him first. In 8 days I won’t even care about him for another month. In a month’s time I will have been to Vegas and back. He only talks to me because I talk to him so when will I realize how stupid this seems? When…

The Root Of Suffering

You don’t think that I know why you keep me in the background but it’s because I never do what you say I only do what you want… It’s because you can’t even really believe how lucky and cursed you are because I have happened to you for the time being for the best and…

Dusty Record Player

Nothing will ever fill the hole. I know that. And all I am doing is pretending that I have that thing. Whatever that thing is. Is it hope? Is it talent? Is it other people? Nothing I ever do will give me the people that I should have had And being mad at them won’t…

By Myself Forever

I like your natural hair today and your natural face and your natural hips and your natural belly and your crazy eyes. I don’t wish for you to be different but in the ways that make you a better version of you to you and for you. You wait for other people to tell you…

Super Lifelike

Whatever I’m designed to feel, I’m feeling whatever is coming will inevitably hurt The trees aren’t swaying at all today So many things left to learn Whatever I’m supposed to see, I’m seeing whatever is gonna happen is in the works The breeze isn’t blowing at all today Yet everything around me burns Maybe I…

Gray hairs on Sweaters

In my mind you’re the finish line. My fantasy has always been slightly different from yours Mine has a lot to do with us being together in the mornings and not just at night… but I’ma fix it… Even though I can’t force your hand. I’ma fix it. In my mind you’re the trophy. Unfortunately…