Warren G and Gluten Free

I’m sorry it’s hard to stop. I’m back in grad school now and I’m panicking. It’s actually pretty fucking great, that’s the problem. It’s legit wonderful. I like school. I like order. I’m trying. I take cranberry pills and plant based digestive enzymes and green tea supplements now. I meditate on Wednesdays and listen to…

Light Switch

I mean yeah We could go out but If we do, I’m gonna order whiskey neat and a beer back and then I’m going to find the Jukebox and play a bunch of Incubus songs in a row then more than likely, I’m going to be ready for another round before you’ve even gotten halfway…

The Nephew of Ishmael

I’m a little antsy in a controlled way. You don’t know me and I don’t know you but it feels like we’ve met. I’m a little nervous in a giddy way. You don’t know me and I’ve never met you but it feels like we’ve kissed. I’m a little excited but not in a scared…

Vladimir Mayakovsky

Not like any of it matters but It was 14 degrees Celsius in Paris today. And you wouldn’t believe it but ants evolved from waspy ancestors and Nobody cares, I know, but if they did they’d read more Carol Ann Duffy and eat more Chia but The mind stands still and Time is unusually resistant…

Borborygmus

I know I said I wasn’t going to be able to live without your touch but please don’t touch me What comes next What comes next I know but you won’t expect I’ve already changed my mind as soon as I said the line and how you respond will determine if I’m more turned on…

The Misadventures of Crazy Girl & Cinnamon Dick

And then he left, hopefully for good because it’s for the best. But I always say that about all of them and I’m always right. So you might ask yourself, how do you end up in these same ass rooms, in same ass situations, with the same ass creepy, codependent, manipulative narcissist chickenshit freak weirdo?…

SCMaglev

You don’t notice the perfection of the pavement until there is a pot hole impeding your path. It’s only there to make you comfy. You ignore the fact that you’re flying through the air in a metal bird if it takes too long to taxi. It only exists to satiate you. You’re oblivious to murder…

No Thru Traffic Here

If you say you coming at 6 and you not here at 6, you late. I’ma be somebody else, on something else already. If you text me good morning beautiful but you aint never seen me in the morning so you don’t even know if that shit is actually true, just to wake me up…

Auditioning Sidekicks

I texted the monster. I told him in case he needed me he had a way to contact me. Then I met Houdini. The right speech patterns, the right spirituality, the right artistic endeavors. But turns out like it turns out he isn’t the fucking brightest. We fucked anyway and we’ve already had a fight….

Son Lux

The thing that I like about him the best is that he said exactly what he thought that this association should look like right out of the gate. My god. He didn’t try to trick me He didn’t try to manipulate me He didn’t try to see where I was vulnerable and exploit me He…