Maybe I’m ready to have a good time. I’ve earned these belly rolls. I’m old enough to stop apologizing for doing things for my comfort alone. The 43rd anniversary of my birth is in 8 days. Maybe I’m ready to be my own home. I’ve paid a few dues. So I’m old enough to not…
Tag: fear
The Odyssey and the Iliad
This is the test and I’ve got to fucking manage it. My stability has only ever been attached to necessity- somebody needing me and for 18 years my child did. After my 2nd suicide attempt when I wanted to go left and sideways and my son was too little still to appreciate my efforts somehow after…
George Wickham
Our new reality is you’re a fucking moron. Its one thing to not like or respect someone but its a whole other thing to feel that way and still attempt to use them as if they have an obligation to you. How stupid could you be? How stupid do you think that I am? (And…
After Nell Fenwick Again
You’re asking me, world, for all this strength and I can barely stand There’s nothing to sweep up and muster sometimes when everything built is on shifting sands All I can do is get back to my weight loss routine get back to some universal truth Get back to standing for something get back to…
Robert Frost
When you begin genuinely, just like he said, you’ll never know from the start where it will end or how When you begin with something on your heart and in your mind but you’ll take whatever it gives you just the same But me I’ve been searching for peace up mountain tops with my soul…
At the Holiday Inn with Logan
You lie to me You cry with me You’ll have to leave me I can’t be strong Our song is on Your heart’s gone Something’s wrong Why don’t you Why can’t you Why won’t you Now you’re gone But our song is on And I’m in two Why didn’t you Let love kill you To…
Contains 0% Juice
This time I am confident that I have finally done what I set out to do so long ago. I scared the shit out of him. And now, hopefully he won’t turn his head and look back. The strange thing about this whole process is that I wish that he would never leave. I wish…
Amaza Lee Meredith
A woman, no different from me, published poetry in 1767. A woman, no different from me, escaped slavery in 1849. A woman, no different from me, opened a school for black girls in 1904. A woman, no different from me, designed a gas furnace in 1919. A woman, no different from me, won an Oscar…
Taking Stock
They lined up, single file in my mind From most recent to the oldest, waiting patiently for their turn to speak when asked to describe being with me. The monster would say She’s a little crazy, a little gullible but useful. He never loved me though… Old Faithful would say She has no capacity for…
For the Folk in The Cheap Seats
If I always looked to see if my hands were shaking first If I always took a full deep breath through the nose exhaling through the mouth first If I always considered the collateral damage of my actions first then I wouldn’t have ever learned a fucking thing in this life or had a damn…
