White Boys in the 80’s

Nate was the first boy I ever thought I loved. He was Tom Cruise and Jon Bender or at least as close as I ever thought that I’d get to them I knew him since he was 8 we went to the same Sunday School and Wednesday Night services and he was a bad kid…

Genghis Khanfidence

Now that I actually noticed it I’m thinking about all these scenarios where I really thought that I was in love with this guy and he was like everything and then, now that I remember correctly something about that situation was related to period sex. I don’t know what love is, I never did. Either…

Hominids at Home

Happily hating everything that we’ve ever made or done or said because the way we build includes and requires deconstruction we all function as our future and our demise a prize for a limited time so while we use it all up including our selves we destroy balance with accidental purpose happily hating everything and…

Lady Philosophy

It’ll twist you up, I promise. You’ll follow all the rules and fail. You’ll read and re-read the formula and fuck it up. And so you grasp on desperately clinging to any little thing you can repeat you keep turning the other cheek because you heard that somewhere and you keep inviting dumb ass people…

What y’all left behind

It’s difficult not to think about on a rainy afternoon in January when you live in a one bedroom apartment by yourself in a suburb of Sacramento believe it or not, it really is so hard not to look back on the shit I kept and the shit I’ve thrown away see I’ve thrown away…

October 1582

In the span of 365 mornings and evenings You could learn to crawl You could start and stop and start You could fall in or down or off You could prove how crazy you really are to the one that you  claim to love You could come to grips with the fact that you and…

Dickrider

I wanna go to the casino I wanna go to the art museum I want to go to a fancy luxury theater I want to take pictures of my experiences to share with the world on social media so that they think I’ve been happy at some point and that I’ve done fun and important…

Portishead and Jim Beam

I’m weird because I can barely see and my mind makes up the deficit by making me over feel… I’m hypersensitive as hell. Over here, over feeling. Everything is painful. Beauty. Hope. Love. Is there a such thing as better anymore if there ever was? I don’t know anything much if I ever did or if…

Smells Like Sage

I need to do what? Pull my bootstraps up? It’s not even 8 am yet and I’m stressed. Oh please, oh please don’t give me that bootstrap speech. My grandmother, rest her, child of the great depression used to run me that fucking line constantly. It’s probably one of the reasons that I’m in therapy…

Bonus and commission eligibility

If I give you some and you don’t get all weird about it and you don’t try to hurt me with it and you don’t tell your friends about it and you don’t immediately regret it and you don’t lose your mind behind it and you don’t start lying to have more of it and…