Sorry, Kid

I didn’t mean to disrespect you actually,

                                                     I meant to befriend you

And occasionally have sex with you

                                           And occasionally ask you to change the oil in my car

And take out the trash in my apartment before you left.

I didn’t want to seem ungrateful,

                                                    When you offered instead

Your heart but its like,

                                               Dude, that wasn’t what I asked for

In the first place.

All I wanted was to be able to call you at 3 AM every once in a while.

All I wanted was for you to take me to the movies every once in a while.

I never wanted you.

                                              So now, I’ve got to seem like the bad guy

When all I really needed was a running partner-

Not a life mate.

Not a soul mate.

Now your heart is broken

                                       And of course, you feel like you should be able to blame it on me

But Dude, I’m sober now and really

Its better you take it hard and fast

So it can heal quicker, right??  And ….

If

It’s not too much

 Of a hassle,

                                           If you could just do me one last solid

Before you move to the village of injustice and despair-

                                           Could you take that milk with you?

You both are expired.