Filthy phones

Let’s say its midday. A random Wednesday. And out of the blue an old friend, a former crush, the boy next door, an acquaintance of 30 years decides to send a text. They always start off innocently enough, since both are parents and in relationships and live 2000 miles apart. But then…

Here is where our story begins…

 

Schroeder: Hey, I just sent you a pic, did you get it?

Pixie: What is it?

S: Something that you will enjoy.

P: Oh that is cute! I love it!

S: Wordplay… like foreplay for nerds LOL

P: It is precisely that!

S: (Smiley face)

P: How are you, BTW?

S: Not bad… understimulated. ( This is where the story takes its turn, turn, turn)

P: Such is life.

S: And you?

P: Apparently I have a moderate sex addiction and I’m a low level psychopath but other than that, peachy.

S: Can I help your addiction?

P:You’re probably one of the preliminary reasons I’m afflicted.

S: I try.

P: I’m glad you are far away. If you were closer I’d have to constantly find new death defying ways to fuck you until your body ached and your skin hurt.

S: I think we should be closer.

P: I carry you around in my mind. Not close enough?

S: I’m happy there…would rather you carry me between your labia. ( Yeah, he said that.)

P: I haven’t had mind blowing sex in five years.  I bet your face would be a good start to my comeback.

S: ( another smiley face)

P: How long can you think of something that should have happened, that didn’t happen, but you wish had happened?

S: I know what you mean.

P: How badly do I want to pull your hair just to hold on while you drill?  I don’t think there is a  word for it.

S: Passionately.

P: That will do. But therein lies the rub. When I’m done, I just want to start over again. You wouldn’t make it out of a hotel elevator before I was dripping.

S: Supposed to be that way.

P: Our history makes me feel safe enough with you that if the opportunity presented itself I wouldn’t resist doing whatever you liked. I owe you one for all the great fantasies over the years.

S: In that case, I owe you at least three or four ( Smiley face)

P: I had it pretty bad when we were younger. I’ve fucked people who favor you.

S: They owe me, big! LOL

P: Yea they do! I was high as a fucking kite at a concert once and I met this dude who looked like you so I just walked up to him and started biting his neck. I remember him saying slow down. I said, no. I’ve waited a long time for this, Schroeder. He goes, baby, my name is Craig!

S: LOL!

P: Needless to say it didn’t really happen like that (psycho) actually he grabbed my ass, so I gave him my number. We fucked a few times and when I said he reminded me of my childhood sweetheart… He stopped calling. LOL. The first way was much better. I gotta drive sweetie. Talk soon.

S: Later, Love you.

And then the texting stops. The threads are deleted from their phones out of courtesy for their spouses and they smile for a while until real life hits again.