Sexicologically Speaking…

So let me get this straight, correct and right..

When we first met

(Back in the day, remember?)

(A long time ago now, remember?)

You found yourself physically attracted to me enough

to start a conversation which led to a relationship

this was solely based on looking at me.

But now, even though I pretty much look the same

save a different glass frame

Save a hair cut here and there and a dye or two

Sex is all of a sudden off the table between me and you

Are you looking at me?

So let me get this straight, correct and right..

Why Why Why?

Is it because you know me now

Is it because you are used to me now

Is it because you don’t love my body anymore

Is it because you’re so exhausted all day everyday

I didn’t change. I still want the exact same amount

of physical affection I received at the onset of this little thing we call love.

Not necessarily more, but most certainly not less.

Not yet, Not yet, Not yet

What’s causing the challenge?

The fighting?

The power/control mind games?

The financial woes?

It’s just not good sex if I have to convince you to have sex

Its just not fun sex if you feel obligated in the first place

Why isn’t it a stress reliever for you?

Why don’t you feel relaxed and connected to me anymore?

How can you survive for months and months

on end

back to back

with no kind of physical contact whatsoever

besides your own two hands?

Again and Again and Again

Did I miss something along the way?

Now that you have seen me clean my ears and brush my teeth

Do you not want to sleep with me anymore?

So let me get this straight, correct and right..

I am supposed to tell myself that I am in a mutually respectful

trusting relationship with someone that I want to spend the rest

of my life with and know that at this time in my life that I can still have

absolutely mind blowing sex but force myself  to forgo that ecstasy

for the pleasure of your company?

Because you are so charming?

If I could fuck your charm, it would be plenty.

Is it because I fart in my sleep

Is it because I don’t want to watch Rambo again

Is it because I insulted your manhood the day you called me fat

Is it because you really were never physically attracted to me in the first place, just incredibly lonely

What’s wrong?

Just don’t leave me hanging on.

I didn’t change. I still think your’e sexy when you’re sleeping or smiling

or wearing the same sweat pants three days in a row or when your breath

smells like boiled eggs and sardines.

Do you want to be with someone else?

Should I be with someone else?

Are you sleeping with someone else?

This just isn’t the way its supposed to be, I mean, I get

that passion wanes, I get the ebb and flow of the thing, I get the fact

that your body is yours and you don’t owe it to me

But why don’t you look at me with lust anymore?

( Like before, remember, before?)

Why do you not cuddle with me when we go to bed like you used to do?

I tell you I’m tired and begging is out of the question, because

logically speaking if you wanted to be fucking me you would be.

Unless you want me to beg… Is that what you need?

Is it so wrong now to still want you inside me?

Tell me what to do please

Tell me if you are falling out of love with me

Tell me if I have to leave-

What’s wrong?

Just don’t leave me hanging on.