I sent a text message to the following people: My fraternity brother, my best friend, my ex husband and my new beau.

The message was exactly the same. I said, ” Contacts are cool but I really miss my glasses.”

My new beau writes back… “Hey enough with all of this texting, call me so we can talk!” Ah, young love. I love him because as soon as I called we talked about my glasses and how cute he thinks that I am with or without them. Special specialness.

My best friend writes back…” Hey how are things at work with the takeover?” He completely avoided the comment that I made because he already knows that I do these sort of weird experiments but said something more important to me anyway. I love him because he cares about what is really going with me and whether I like it or not he looks out for my best interests even when I am being petty. ( And I am petty a lot).

My ex husband writes back… ” I don’t wear contacts, only my spectacles.” The comment had nothing to do with him! Typical. This is probably the reason we will always only ever be friends because he is more self absorbed than I am. It’s not supposed to be a competition, sweetie.  I love him because I can’t fault him for his vanity, he is also a crazed narcissistic writer just like myself so what more could I expect, really? Had he made the comment, I probably would have responded in kind.

My fraternity brother writes back… ” Why?” He is nary a wordsmith but I suppose this was my favorite response. He lets me talk about myself all the time without judgement so either he isn’t paying attention and could care less or he is just a really good listener. I love him because I choose to believe the latter. Thanks, Frat.