Instabang

He was explaining it to me but I wasn’t getting it.

He said insta-bangs are when you save up a lot of awesome stuff that you do for your girl to earn intercourse without incident.

I was like what is that?

He said if you have insta-bangs saved up you can use them when you need them, and your girl can’t complain because you’re calling in one of your insta-bangs that you earned fair and square. ..like I already have 4 saved up with you!!! Watch out now!

I laughed. Four, really?

We laughed together.

We talked about any and everything for a while.

Time passed.

Eventually we started talking about aspirations and goals.

He said my dream job would be to be a high school basketball coach.

So I said, why aren’t you a high school basketball coach then?

He said because most high school coaching positions require that you also teach a regular course at the school too and he has no idea what else he would teach.

He started to go into the list of all of the reasons why it wouldn’t work.

All of the obstacles in his path.

So I said well then that isn’t your dream. Your dream is something that you want so desperately that the roadblocks in your path can never deter you from seeking that dream out. Every obstacle over come just makes you more and more in love with the dream, it’s a part of you that you would be miserable with out and you would never give up on it no matter how hard it gets to keep pursuing it. It doesn’t even feel hard to go after it because, ta da, it’s your dream.

He said well since you put it that way, it’s not my dream.

So I said, what is?

And he said, you are. And then he kissed me.

I blushed.

And then he said, and that’s how I earn insta-bangs. Now I have five. Cha-Ching.