For the next billion days

I know us being a we is my fantasy, not yours.
With all of my soul I believe men get what they want, period.
I’m not what you want, I couldn’t be.
I don’t have any other way to feel about it, that’s fact.
The sun is high and the wind can be cold. Facts.
I know this because I have been chased down, stalked,
found via friends and internet searches, and navy cyphers
last known location and drive bys at my job
always impressed to what great lengths
they have gone to just to find, well me.
And the sick disappointment they feel when I refuse,
that pain I know well.
Because I have known you.
you taught it to me.
I find comfort there now.
So, hope here is futile.
And I get it and I understand it and as a matter of fact
I have made peace with the fact of it.
The water is wet and the dark is absolute. Facts.
I want your happiness.
So until you tell me not only no but also stop,
I’ll play whatever little role in your life
that you assign to me.