Selective Serotonin Re-uptake Inhibitor

I look good, I feel good and everything works out for me….
Background mantra interrupted by a chipped nail
Time. Stands. Still
Two minutes until too late for work and everything is overdue
I’m happy if I feel happy and happiness is a choice…
Splice to him in the frame smiling because he doesn’t know or can’t see or refuses to acknowledge
The chipped nail. The bills. The insecurity on my shirt
And sweet nothings to cope by change, Pan to
You’re stupid, you can’t get anything right, you will always be a complete mess.
No one else is going through this, just you, only you
It’s only 7 AM
Time. Carries. On
You’re hurting in lipstick, hurting in high heels hurting in corsets and harsh lighting
Staring at awards accumulated for excellence and the only medicine you take
for mental trauma comes in liquid ounces and alcohol content warning labels
No one else is going through this, just you, only you
Backdrop suburbia and picket fences and natural grass
and he just wants to hug you before you start your day which actually ended with flaking polish
Everyone’s voices echo you are amazing amazing amazing and all you know is that
Time. Takes. Too . Damn. Long
No one else is going through this, just you, only you
If you could sleep if you could just sleep forever you would forget that you are fat and bitter
and scared and mean and down right useless, eyes welling up while you try to remember
Be kind to yourself you’re okay you’re alive and you’re beautiful….
It’s only 7:01 AM
No one else is going through this, just you, only you
But all the thoughts behind your round doe eyes is with all that is wrong with you, how could you be loved?
End Scene and back to pretending invisibility and tequila is the remedy for self loathing
Cry on the inside and flash pearly white teeth
You are your only enemy…

vv

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