Like most people, Micki was nervous about her blind date.
She sat in the crowded coffee shop, alone, hoping that the orchid that she had placed lovingly behind her right ear was going to signal her potential suitor, Michael, like they had agreed.
Stop fidgeting, reminded Micki One. This guy is great, sweetie, he is perfect for you. He hit all the right notes in your correspondence, he is an up and comer in his field, no children to speak of, reads poetry and likes art, it’s all going to be fine. Have faith in yourself.
Micki sipped her coffee and instantly regretted not adding a second sugar packet. She smiled at a little girl carrying a Disney Princess book bag but only because the girl would not stop staring.
You’re probably the most stupid person in here, taunted Micki Two. Who still goes on blind dates? Desperate losers, that’s who. More than likely this clown is sitting somewhere in the coffee shop right now, refusing to come anywhere near you because your ass is hanging over the back of the seat. No one really wants to date someone like you, fool. Just drink your damn coffee and pretend like that’s why you came in here because just like before, darling, this is going to turn into a complete disaster. Accept it. You’re always going to be lonely.
Micki took a deep breath and reached into her purse, moving things around but she couldn’t remember what she was looking for so she pulled out her chap-stick and applied a thick layer on her lips. The coffee cup nearly slipped out of her sweaty hands after she took her next sip. So she wiped the lip balm off into a napkin.
A cute college age couple walked in, wearing pajamas and unbuttoned coats. The woman in the couple had on no makeup and the man couldn’t keep his hands out of her hair as they stared at the menu, barely awake and clearly in love.
Be positive, sweetie, said Micki One, he’s good looking and sweet. Don’t kid yourself, darling, responded Micki Two, he probably has a ZZ Top Beard and cheap shoes.
Micki rearranged the napkin holder on the small table, nearly tipping it and decided to check her phone for any messages so that she didn’t look out of place.
Why do you keep doing this to me, pleaded Micki Three.  Shit, sugar, we’re all we need! You raised yourself, put yourself through college, own your own home and car, traveled out of the country on your own. You run your own office, nearly paid off all of your own debt and have published three books. I don’t need a damn man to feel validated, so why do you? You are smart, and important and relevant, just like I am. Why can’t we just go buy me that princess cut diamond I was looking at and take a ten day vacation to Madrid, like I always wanted? Why do I have to sit here and pray that some guy is going to make any difference in our life? Surely I can find a better use for an afternoon! He’ll find someone else to disrespect, lie to, mooch off of and impregnate if you leave now anyway. Let me leave, please!
The barista was telling the cashier a joke about a customer and Micki could tell this by their shifty eyes and whispers. It made her feel uncomfortable.
He’s coming sweetie, we came all this way, this could be a great adventure! let’s wait for him out of respect, suggested Micki One. He’s probably finishing getting his dick sucked before he gets here in case you are the fat sow you clearly are so just get a doughnut and listen to Micki Three, darling, we can blow this Popsicle stand- no one has to know you’re a lonely sucker unless you tell them, offered Micki Two.
Micki Three just started listing names- What would Diane Keaton, Oprah Winfrey, Coco Chanel and Susan B.fucking Anthony think about you sitting here right now, sugar?
Micki asked for a refill and went for the second sweetener but before she opened it, she placed it back in the packet holder on the table. The sun shone brightly on the snow. The air in the cafe was crisp and saturated with the aroma of chocolate and graham cracker instead of roasted coffee.
Put the orchid on the left side, sweetie, Micki One offered. I think the right side means you are already spoken for, that might throw him off.
Put the orchid in the damn trash, yelled Micki Two. The dumb ass told you to use a tulip- like he fucking cares that you are allergic to tulips! He won’t notice the orchid anyway your tits are the only ones completely covered in this stupid shop.
Dr. Condoleeza Rice, Micki Three whispered, Condoleeza motherfucking Rice!
Micki picked up her purse, gulped the last of her coffee, left the orchid on the empty table and brushed past a well dressed bearded man as she exited the cafe to hail a taxi home. It was starting to snow again.
The bearded man, Michael, sat down at the empty table where the flower was, smiled and took off his coat and scarf. He ordered an Earl Grey tea and looked around.
She’s on her way I bet, said Michael to himself, and she’s gonna love this orchid that I found.
He put the orchid on his lapel and blew some of the steam off of his tea.


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