Shy girl in a quiet cafe reading Shakespeare

What if we got it all wrong?
The goal is a peaceful state- one that is not rattled by changes- unaffected by the roller coaster of circumstances.
An even keel, if you will.

But our hunt for the perfect partner
inadvertently teaches us
to look for the mate that gives us
butterflies and goosebumps
and sets our skin ablaze
Maybe that’s not the right thing…

What if we got it all wrong though, What if you never lost that loving feeling?
What if that is fight or flight?

Shouldn’t that swell of emotion and uncontrollable alarm blaring actually stand for what it stands for in every other situation, that this is a signal to actually skedaddle in the other direction?
When your adrenaline is pumping, aren’t you in danger?

What if we got it wrong?
Think about all of those relationships that you have been in that were based off of
that electric physical connection… How long did they last?
How mad did you get when that feeling waned?

When your gut is all freaking out isn’t it a warning?
Love should be steady, right? Love should be patient and kind and all of that. It should be tranquil in a world of chaos.
Like a doctor.
Like a sniper.
Like a serene sea.
Perhaps we should partner
for the long term
with people who do not make our blood scream
like we scream
when we are falling.
Is that why they call it falling in love?
Because it hurts to fall in?
Should real long lasting love
hurt in the first place or at all or ever?

I think we may have it all wrong.
If the goal state of being is peace
Might we be
better off picking a partner who we feel peace around
whose presence doesn’t fluctuate our relaxation
a calming deep breath slow and steady person
with no hot wire spark interference.
Who wants a physical manifestation of a hot stove
equivalent to a chemical reaction of back away?

I’m not saying desire is bad but what has desire ever got you but addiction?
What has desire ever culminated into but suffering?
So maybe we got it all wrong. …
If a person makes you feel out of control
unpredictable or “alive”
what is the difference between that and
being chased by a charging grizzly bear?
Nobody ever wants to marry the bad boy
no one wants to live on a roller coaster
instead we simply want to pretend to die
Here and there
And from time to time.

Those people who want you
that don’t give you the shivers
keep getting overlooked
for the sky diving gut wrenching heart beat thumpers
who will eventually do to you what their warning signals initially suggested
cause you enormous amounts of pain
Nothing but a blood soaked memory to gain…..

Maybe I got it wrong.
Maybe he wasn’t ever meant to
Call me





2 thoughts on “Shy girl in a quiet cafe reading Shakespeare

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