Esther Pauline “Eppie” Lederer

You like hanging onto nothing
The boy is peanut butter in your hair
Do not text the runner up when you are in this frame of mind
Do not text the back up and tease him with your lying
Do not text number two, or three, especially not fucking three
Don’t become the vision you’re fighting not to see
Because you can’t have what you really wanted
Don’t use people just stop
Be alone with rejection
Trust me, its not
As bad as your feelings are making it seem
You’re exaggerating
You’re overreacting
It doesn’t mean anything
And neither does he
So don’t break someone else’s heart because you
can’t accept the plain fucking truth
Don’t fuck over number two
find something else to do
Number one is just having fun
You don’t have to be the villain on this one
It’s okay simply breathe
None of this stands for anything
It has nothing to do with your value or you winning
It’s not even a big deal if you’d just stop racing
And acting crazy
And pacing
You’re catastrophizing
You’re lying
It’s normal sometimes to lose
for everyone else and this time, even for you
You like hanging onto to things that aren’t really there
the boy is a paper doll of someone who cares
Do not text the guy who likes you when you’re in this head space
Do not play with real emotions when yours are fake
Do not text number four and certainly not number five
When you know the hurt is all that’s keeping you alive
Don’t use people just stop
Be alone with rejection its not
As bad as your feelings are making it seem
You’re editing
You’re pretending…
Don’t use people just stop
Be alone with rejection its not
As bad as your feelings are making it seem
Like peanut butter in your damn hair
It’s your fault it’s there…

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