I thought it was because I wasn’t well versed and I was unrehearsed
or because I couldn’t get loving them quite right
then I thought it must be because of the way I appear and their own preferential fear
or because I couldn’t love the things that they loved quite right
And as I continued to ruminate I finally noticed that this has always been the case
I have always come in last place
and perhaps I had been looking at this all wrong
they couldn’t use a newbie at the time, couldn’t use an amateur at life, couldn’t use a big girl especially if she’s brown, couldn’t use a chick who didn’t want to kick it on the bad side of town
All this time I thought something was wrong with me, yet I’m starting to see
quite simply none of them from childhood on wanted to bet on me
because none of them could figure out how to best USE me
Maybe being useless is the best thing to be
Maybe being useless is a blessing