When the free trial ends

Had you caught me ten years ago and said I like you but…
I’d never know what came after but until I’d given you more than anyone could deserve and yet in the middle of the night you’d quietly left.
Just a mere five years ago I would have turned your life upside down because of that but and made you love me out of spite knowing full well I was playing a game with your entire life.

You just want to sit around playing in wet clay but you’re not even going to attempt to build anything with it?
Uhmm….

I just want someone that I don’t have to be fake around or for.
Just someone who expects nothing from me and stays.
Just someone for whom every okay from me is a blessing.
Every yes from me is a delightful surprise.
Just someone who doesn’t mind starting over and over and over but with each other.
Just someone who can see me, like I am right now, and if I never change, they know they are lucky and when I inevitably do, they know they are luckier still.
Just someone to have inside jokes with.
Someone I can count on to be a card carrying member of team me and vice versa even if that means telling me to act right.

But you caught me today.

And if you’re not ready darling, I’m not waiting.
You just said you like me but…
And honey, these days the but is all I hear
and none of the rest of it even matters.
So I’m leaving before anyone gets hurt…

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