The Vivifying Spells for people like me

This post is a list of all of the quotes and mantras and inspirational comments I have found across the internet, on television, in books and videos over the years. My sincerest apologies to all of the original authors that I have not recognized, in no way am I trying to take credit for your work by compiling it or trying to profit from it in anyway. This post, this list, these words, have actually kept me alive over the years so I may not recall where I got the words from, often I would scribble them on the edge of a notebook that I was carrying with me, through tears mind you, so that I could remember them later, when I was down and out once again, and felt out of options. So to all of the humans who have contributed to this list, thank you, thank you, thank you. I’m sharing these in a post form finally because for one I’m tired of carrying around scraps of paper every time I move across the country but also, there is probably at least one person, somewhere on the water ball, experiencing the same thing that I have, and cannot find the positive uplifting voice inside to help them keep going for one more day. My hope is that someone directs them to this post, so that they can view some insights from others just like us who lived before us and while we lived, who understood our pain and shame and want us to not only grow and survive until our time is up, but thrive- heal and help one another. Again, most of these words are not mine… they are ours.

One last thing, I cannot demand that you consume these words in any particular way because they did not all stem from me. However, often I would read one and contemplate it, and repeat it over and over until I felt like it was underneath my skin enough to at least take one step forward. I argued with the sayings, cried about them alone with myself and went back many many times to re-read them when I had forgotten them in the midst of a new crisis, in the same way that we forget to stay in the moment, or have to constantly wipe our bums and brush our teeth. I hope they help you too, however you decide is best and whenever possible as often as needed.

Sorry… also if you know who wrote these, and can verify it, if you will comment on this post with the live bibliography for me and for all of us you are doing an amazing thing! I will number them for this reason only, they will not be typed here in any other particular order. There is probably so much more that we can learn from the authors!
Thanks once again,
out here surviving just like you…
Ms Pixie Prince, aka Queen Rude bka TL Banks, human.

1.  I will not get my needs met through anger.
2.  These problems that I have are common.
3.  See your own goodness.
4.  Make peace with yourself.
5.  Pay attention to where you pay attention.
6.  I am the experiencer, not the experience.
7.  I can practice loving kindness toward myself and others.
8.  I am stronger and more resilient than I know.
9.  Embrace your imperfections.
10. Live happily anywhere.

11. As long as you are complaining about others, you are not accepting responsibility.
12. Relax in the midst of chaos.
13. ‘Fine’ is not what I came here to experience. Let’s be bright!
14. Stay calm, detached and flexible.
15. Expecting others to care for me is disempowering.
16. I don’t have to control my thoughts, I have to stop letting them control me.
17. Ask for help and accept it!
18. What I’ve been through got me here. Who knows, if I keep going, where I’ll end up!
19. Just keep moving forward!
20.  What do you expect anyone else to do for you?

21. You can care for yourself now in ways you did not experience as a child.
22. Dignity grows when you can say no to yourself.
23. Slow down and try to see it all, step by step.
24. Everything will be okay, or get better.
25. Challenge negative thoughts about yourself. Strip it down to the facts.
26. I am lovable. I am capable.
27. Notice when you are resisting reality.
28. This situation may not be exactly what I want but it is what it should be based n everything that has happened.
29. Stay present, beautiful.
30. There are many different paths to the same destination.

31. What you feel is who you are. What you do with those feelings is who you choose to become.
32. Expect twists. Expect turns.
33. Practice self care. Practice patience.
34. Don’t trust anything that you can lose.
35. Evaluate your assumptions.
36. Forgiveness is just another way to say freedom.
37. You can save yourself heartache by acting because you want to act,  but not expecting anything!
38. Need to cope? Play music. Dance. Count down from 90!
39. Depression is a lack of power disorder.
40. Enjoy the time you have.

41. Happiness does not exist in things that can be taken by chance.
42. What would I tell a loved one to do with the same problem?
43. Not all storms come to disrupt your life. Some come to clear your path.
44. If the ocean can calm itself, so can you. We are both just salt water mixed with air.
45. I don’t know the future, so I should stop projecting it.
46. Trust proof when it comes to other people.
47. I see you. I get you. I am you.
48. The chaotic universe in me is calmed by believing we are together in this.
49. I care for myself.
50. Love yourself because that just might be all the love you get in this world and if you are doing it right, it is enough.

51. Address it if it’ll matter in 5 years. otherwise, let it go.
52. What can you tell yourself in order to feel better now?
53. Charlotte Bronte is quoted as saying, The more solitary, the more friendless, the more unsustained I am, the more I will respect myself.
54. There just aren’t a lot of real definites that you need to commit to.
55. Charity is for the foulness of self and others.
56. Any tendency to go to extremes works against you.
57. Do you even know how many times you should have died, already?
58. The world isn’t going to love you because you are nice to it.
59. Opportunities come to the flexible.
60. Check your assumptions again and again.

61. When ‘shoulds’ don’t reflect reality you get mad.
62. If fear is at the helm, laughing and crying are the same.
63. When you could see anything, what do you choose to see?
64. Every image you conjure comes into the eye, upside down.
65. ‘God’ must be so sad, could you imagine not being able to die?
66. You make fun of what you’re most afraid to be.
67. A door’s peephole is all you get to see of the world.
68. If you can still see insanity, then you are still okay.
69. Change is good. Do your best when it comes.
70. The things that make me different, make me strong.

71. What would my life be like if I no longer believed the pain I feel?
72. I can allow myself to experience happiness that I did not orchestrate in advance.
73. I can consider alternatives.
74. Ask for clarification and stay calm.
75. Anger makes a slave.
76. Be kind as you mind your own business.
77. Put yourself into the offender’s shoes.
78. Carol Burnett is quoted as saying Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.
79. The cure for anger is patience. Just wait.
80. Admit when something is wrong. You cannot fix what you will not acknowledge.

81. Breathe. Heal the injustice inside because anger adds further damage.
82. Make yourself a priority in your own life.
83. Turn insults into the jokes that they are.
84. Spend time getting to know yourself like you would a beloved friend.
85. You’ve fucked up before too so keep that in mind as one of your reasons for staying as calm as you can.
86. What you do gives you what you get from the only thing you control, yourself.
87. Don’t be blinded and controlled by rage. Recognize what causes that emotional reaction and avoid it.
88. If you’re ‘fine’ why change? Why grow?
89. I say that rejection is better than regret.
90. What people think about us is not in our control and what we can’t control is secondary. Let that shit go if it affects your peace!

91. Accept yourself unconditionally.
92. If life has not been fair to you, why would you expose others to the pain that you have endured?
93. I am okay and this too shall pass.
94. Pain is a learning position.
95. May I be safe and filled with peace because all is well.
96. Familiar may not always be a good thing.
97. I feel myself relaxing because I choose to be at peace.
98. I did not choose my trauma but I am choosing to recover.
99. I give myself permission to let go of what does not serve me.
100. You can be afraid of change and yet willing to do so anyway.

101. Surround yourself with supportive people.
102. Whatever we practice grows stronger.
103. No harm come to me or to anyone else because of me.
104. Treat yourself with kindness.
105. Set realistic goals.
106. I will remain mindful of what I can control which are my actions and attitudes.
107. Action conquers fear.
108. Everything is temporary, including thoughts, emotions and people.
109. May I and my loved ones walk the earth freely.
110. Future me is deciding today who I want to be tomorrow.

111. I am beautiful, talented, worthy and loved, even when I don’t know it and don’t feel it.
112. There’s nothing that can’t either be forgiven, forgotten, repaired or replaced.
113. Sheryl Sandberg is quoted as saying that done is better than perfect.
114. Pause. Say yes to what is here.
115. Turn towards love and rest in awareness.
116. Others treat you how you treat you.
117. You’re not milk. Loving yourself will not spoil you.
118. Change your environment if you can, remove yourself from negative stimulus if you are able, calm yourself whenever possible.
119. An immense amount of pettiness is dropped if your death makes a gesture toward you.
120. What are you unwilling to feel?

121. Work at it without hope and without despair and don’t hurry and keep going.
122. Integritas.
123. Don’t chase people, attract them.
124. Feel all of the feelings that you need to feel and then get back to work on you.
125. Understand the weaknesses of your strengths.
126. Today, I choose to focus on what I can have an impact on.
127. Aristotle is quoted as saying to avoid criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing.
128. ‘Things’ don’t matter that much.
129. Be the ax for the frozen sea within you.
130. Make no angry choices and if you have to, let them go.

131. Appreciate what you do have.
132. Control assumptions of rejection sensitivity with effortful acknowledgement of reality.
133. Happiness is a choice.
134. Enjoy the ride.
135.  A new habit= New behavior plus time plus reason plus desire.
136. Improve the relationship with yourself because you’re the most important thing to you.
137. Forgive the past and accept all of yourself.
138. Practice self approval. When you start to crave it, give it to yourself.
139. Own your impact.
140. What if I believed that today I am deserving and capable?

141. Focus on your outputs.
142. Embrace non comparison- they are on their path and good for them. You are on your own path.
143. A lifetime isn’t very long.
144. We are never in control. We control nothing. There is no such thing as control. Control is in your mind.
145. Trust that you will be okay.
146. Help but do not expect.
147. Look at all of your kudos.
148. R. Ingersoll is quoted as saying we rise by lifting others.
149. What can I learn right here? What can I offer?
150. I can be friends with the things about myself that I do not love.



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