When I can’t solve some other problem my mind circles back to you, monster.
I wonder what you’re up to.
Probably no good, of course.
You’re an easy fix, a whiskey shot, a different life I could be living.
Every now and again when I don’t think there is any more hope on the road I’ve chosen the thought of you wearing my handcuffs crosses my weary mind.
Usually, when the wind is favorable I can resist your call, monster.
I am well aware that you are just a horribly spoiled horny and bored country brat and its not in my best interest to indulge your demented fantasies but like I said sometimes when I remember I am human and not a super-efficient robot, I can’t help myself.
Sometimes I miss you, monster, and your bunny rabbit perversions.
And thinking of you distracts me from my blown tire, or investment loss, or fight with a friend.
And after I’ve pretended you and I could work for a while I remember that you want me to move back to the Midwest and live in the corn and the snow.
This makes no sense. A dildo goes in my carry on bag, why the fuck would I have to go across the country for one?
And I don’t even want to have sex with you, you know that. I just want to breathe in your face after I’ve had sex with someone else, just like you like.
And I also know that your family would be super upset to see you in heels and my wigs and lashes as high as a kite taking my dick and who knows who else’s at my command for weeks on end with no breaks and nobody’s heard from you because you have to answer to Sheila Sluttybutt now or some shit, or whatever I have chosen to humiliate you.
Mind you, if you had your way, this would be our life together, monster.
And maybe you’re right, maybe I shouldn’t be concerned about whether or not you’d survive under my thumb but I have to be honest, I don’t think I ought to leave those kinds of life-changing decisions up to a bitch like you, no offense.
You don’t seem to know what’s good for you all the time, bunny rabbit.
I always hope you’re well and safe.
Sometimes I just want you to say you miss me, you know, so I can know I still have a hold over you even though its been years since I’ve kissed your face.
And this helps me solve whatever my problem is on a couple of levels, because for one, whatever will be will be.
And for two if it is outside of my control why the fuck am I stressed about it and for three if I can fix it, I should.
I don’t need to be instructed and intimated to do what is right like you do, monster.
I don’t need to be choked first.
Still, sometimes I wonder what you are up to…
I hope you’re okay, beautiful, I really do.