I blame the sun for life instead of thanking it
I wish that wishing made tangible painlessness
Living forever isn’t wealth like they think it is
Why do I see the world through black-hued lenses
That’s the question and in it, the answer lies
Whenever you are losing grip on reality you ask why
I am fearful and possessive, I’m weak for what I crave
The sun made the body but I can choose how it behaves
If I do as I wish perhaps what happens nullifies the pain
of living for now and feeling each second’s weight
there’s no why only when I accept the darkest part of fate
will I have an answer so in the shade I howl and wait

Two years of turmoil, temptations, and trials unfold in this anthology of poetic musings by TL Banks. In a quick and chaotic changing world the mind of one hopelessly romantic and fiercely opinionated woman was changing as well…was love the answer to all questions or was death or both? Her ravings are problematic and passionate and 100% human. This collection of weirdly resonant and unhemmed lyrical edges captures sloppy moments and messy memories that are sad and still triumphant as TL grapples with what pierces her armor the most- the misunderstood and stigmatized mechanization of Borderline Personality Disorder and the counterintuitive steps toward sanity during a global pandemic.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BT6RHGW2?ref_=pe_3052080_397514860