Raising The Terror Factor

It’s still the final day of 2025 where I live and I am celebrating the new year gratefully.
I feel like I’ve learned a ton this year about myself and relationships and work life balance and just being a human.
Looking back at some of this blog posts over the years and my stars, the growth.
Super happy that I created this outlet for myself.
If this is the first post you’ve ever encountered I encourage you to read on, and enjoy bits of my life.
If something resonates with you, awesome. If you hate all of it, that’s cool too, appreciate the attention.
I need so much less of it now, which is not something I thought could ever be a thing.
If I get attention for my work then great but if I never really do, that’s great also because I still did it. I still made it. Still wrote it. Still published and sold a lot of it. Still look back and am impressed as hell with the great parts. I’m just astounded about everything at times.
I’ve been trying to figure out what it is that I am supposed to leave behind and on the final day of the year I think it’s the alter ego I built, Pixie Prince. Man, she saved a bitch for real. Got me through some rough stuff. Made sure I had a fucking ball in complete chaotic terror at all times but now, at this stage, I need to use different skills to survive and thrive. Can I do it though, change? I mean, I’ve done everything else. All the worst things that could happen either already did or won’t. I used to be afraid of myself like I needed to be ashamed to be magnificent because it was different, weird, quirky, loose, free, wild- but I am though. And guess what else I can use my inside and outside voice now, I like my shadow, she’s the shit actually and I’m not afraid to be, all the versions of me I’ve needed, simultaneously. I flow. It’s nice. It’s new. It’s scary to not pretend, or siphon off or be scared no one approves. BUT I SEE THE SHIT THEY APPROVE OF AND NOW I UNDERSTAND.
Whoever you are reading this, you kick ass. You’re the best and I mean that. . Thanks to all of you readers. Thanks to Pixie Prince. Thanks to gumption. Thanks to Kane. Thanks to the monster. Thanks to Therapy. Wow…I’m going to go feel something new and I may not document it here but this will always be a place I can come back to, and you can too, to remember, to feel what you need to feel and to tell me what you think.
And if I don’t see you in 2026, BE GOOD. DO GOOD, AND TAKE GOOD CARE.